


Quarantine

by Danally, Fangfaceandrea



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Crush at First Sight, F/M, Fluff and Humor, Friendship, Mutual Pining, Romance, quarantine challenge
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-01
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:40:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,089
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24491416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Danally/pseuds/Danally, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fangfaceandrea/pseuds/Fangfaceandrea
Summary: Pod is one of Jeoffrey’s very removed cousins and Joffrey hears a rumor that his cousin is a ladies man, so he tries to get his help to have him seduce Sansa and therefore have an excuse to break up with her and not have the blame placed on him.Pod has no idea how not to get involved in his little cousin's ridiculous plot, but he's also no opposed to getting to know Sansa a bit more.
Relationships: Joffrey Baratheon/Sansa Stark, Podrick Payne & Sansa Stark, Podrick Payne/Sansa Stark
Comments: 2
Kudos: 7





	1. Podrick I

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Fangfaceandrea](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fangfaceandrea/gifts).



> This story came from [fangfaceandrea's](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fangfaceandrea/pseuds/Fangfaceandrea) amazing mind after having just a [photo](https://fangfaceandrea.tumblr.com/post/615231166925209600/a-tbt-from-dan-or-modern-au-where-pod-is-one) where Daniel Portman is with the actors who play Joffrey and Renly.

**_PODRICK I_ **

****

_"How would you like to seduce my girlfriend?"_

You must be wondering how I, Podrick Payne, ended up getting the most inconceivably absurd, impertinent, insolent, and stupid proposition...at least, until that point in my life.

It all started on Friday night with the Lannister family reunion they were throwing that weekend. And no, I'm not a Lannister, I'm a Payne the grandson of Genna Lannister and to make this story more bearable, Joffrey and I are second cousins. Rather than being considered family, I was invited to the meeting because I have a few voting shares on the board of Lannister _INC., which_ will come into play later in this story. But I'd better not get ahead of myself. The point is, I was at _Casterly Rock._

_And so was she._

The most stunningly gorgeous and charming woman I've ever met. Seriously. A goddess would be putting it mildly.

And maybe this whole story didn't start on Friday but the evening before when Myrcella introduced us. _Sansa Stark._ I immediately knew who she was, from her last name and what family she was affiliated with.

What I didn't know yet was that she was my dear cousin Joffrey's girlfriend.

_Just so it’s completely clear, the ‘dear’ was meant as sarcasm._

So there I was, trying to catch up on my work when Myrcella burst onto the balcony talking about not wanting to be a bad hostess but that she had to leave for a few hours, and who better to keep Sansa company than her beloved cousin. In fact, I think I was the first person she found in her path, and Sansa and I both smiled at her apologies.

Yes, for the first few seconds I was struck dumb by her beauty.

We began to talk, and soon she told me she was a fashion designer. That she and Cersei were practically partners having set up a business together; a Dorne-based business, where Sansa was the mind and supervisor. I could hear the pride in her voice and after talking about myself at _her behest, I_ asked her quietly if she hadn’t been afraid of selling her soul to the Lannisters, which made her laugh, telling me that Cersei wasn't _so_ bad. And mockingly, she went on to say that I was not one to speak, for I was a Lannister too, to which I complained with a mock gasp that made us laugh out loud.

From then on, the talk went even more smoothly.

Minutes later, I was surprised when I closed my laptop so that I could devote my full attention to her. I was trying to come across as confident, unaffected by her beauty, by her crystal-clear eyes, her voice, her mouth, her perfect skin, her obvious charm. Reading her as best I could to make our conversation enjoyable. And everything seemed to be working fine.

In fact, time flew. Before I knew it, we had left the balcony and we were walking through one of the gardens. And by that time, I knew she was much more than just beautiful. She was intelligent, charming, entertaining, irresistible. _The whole package._

Actually, while we were deciding to sit in front of the pool, I thought she was playing with me when she asked me to take off my sunglasses because she didn't like not knowing where I was looking at. And _yes,_ I only had eyes for her. I ignored her, and moments later she –in what I would no longer consider playing but flirting– reached over to my face and took my glasses off with her own hand. She put them on as we laughed, and then when she took them off we stared into each other’s eyes for a few moments.

"...I was expecting green eyes.”

"...Nah, just ordinarily brown..." and the expression on her face when she looked down for a brief second and then back to look me in the eye as she kept smiling, killed me. By the gods, I wanted to throw myself at her and hug her.

So yes, by then I was already lost. And yes, maybe sometimes I fall in love easily.

From then on, I was just drooling over her. _Although I made sure not to show it._

By the end of the afternoon, when I saw Joffrey and Tommen approaching us, I was annoyed by the interruption. Still, we acknowledged each other and everything fell apart with disappointment when I saw Joffrey bending down to kiss her on the head hastily and absentmindedly.

"Entertaining my girlfriend?"

The sardonic grin annoyed me. And in the multitude of emotions I saw him leaving us without any more words, not even giving her an acknowledgement that he noticed her. Shit, Tommen noticed her more than Joffrey did, sharing with her a kiss on the cheek to then follow his big brother, rackets in hand.

But she did follow Joffrey with her eyes, and I swear the idiot didn't even notice. Her smile faded, a gesture I decided not to pay any more attention to.

And _'entertaining my girlfriend' I_ can't deny that his words echoed in my mind when it became obvious that my cousin wasn't entertaining her properly.

That was the time to get back to reality.

Instead, we kept talking, she seemed interested in going back to it and, who am I to refuse? We had already talked about her work, mine. Places we had both visited. Hobbies, music, movies. The mysterious virus that was attacking and locking up Essos and Westeros. And I thought there wouldn't be much more to talk about, but I was wrong.

It was an enjoyable afternoon.

And, I sorry, I got a little side tracked. Let's get to the point.

_Friday night. In the middle of the family reunion._

She comes down looking gorgeous, of course _,_ minimal makeup, hair gathered in a high ponytail in a seemingly careless manner, going by the locks that were loose; the hairstyle was conspicuous so as not to look like she spent hours fixing it. A dress in floral prints that was both loose while it hugged tightly every curve it was supposed to.

She was greeting everyone she knew, which _apparently was everyone._ And I didn't want to prove myself in need of her attention so I kept my distance. Minutes later I was on my way back from the bar when I heard her calling my name. She came to me, greeting me with a quick kiss on the cheek that made me blush, since I didn't know we were already that familiar, and taking my arm she began to pull me along as she thanked me for saving her from the clutches of _Creepyfinger;_ the nickname made me laugh as it was as unexpected as the whole situation. _"Oh, another suitor?"_ I asked, looking over my shoulder, the man was left there standing awkwardly after her sudden departure.

_"What do you mean, ‘another one’?"_

She asked mockingly, _not even playing dumb, fully aware of the impact she had on me._ I smiled more openly at the blush that suddenly overtook her as she tried to contain her own smile. And there I was, recklessly going after my cousin's girlfriend, "It can't come as a surprise, according to the tabloids you are one of the most beautiful women in Westeros.”

"You shouldn't believe everything you read in those trashy websites."

"I do not. That's my assessment, too. " _And I made her blush even more!_ But after a moment, her eyes swept the area around us and she let go of my arm, so I knew I'd messed up, and had made her uncomfortable. Which made me make note to bite my tongue from then on. _And she was my cousin's girlfriend, I_ reminded myself again, "I'm sorry." I told her. She didn't have the chance to reply because someone came up to us and greeted her, taking her away almost immediately.

So, I was kicking myself for the rest of the evening until Joffrey provided me with a distraction.

_"How would you like to seduce my girlfriend?"_

For a few moments, I thought he was drunk, or high. _"You want me to what?"_ Believe me, I remained confused for a few more moments, I even thought that it was me the one who was drunk or high, or that I was having a rather absurd dream.

"Come on, dude, I've heard you are a ladies man _._ " Joffrey smiled slyly, "So, what I said, how would you like to seduce my girlfriend? She's a Goddess, isn't she?”

_Yes. That's what I thought I had heard before. And yes, she was more than a Goddess._

_The most inconceivably absurd, impertinent, insolent, and stupid_ _proposition…_ Moreover, I had no explanations to get an idea of what Joffrey was really asking, but he promptly gave them to me, patting me on the shoulder and drawing me to him as if we were lifelong buddies. And to tell you the truth, for a millionth of a second I thought I had misunderstood everything and that what he was proposing was a bizarre and incestuous threesome _and_ –

"–I just want you to seduce her. Get her off my back. You ever hear that saying that behind a beautiful woman there's always a man who's sick of her shit? Well, _t hat's me._ "

_Yeah, I’ve heard that._ But my first and only thought was that no way someone could get tired of a woman like her, _she was a darling._ And Joffrey was a well-known idiot, so the one who was on the wrong was him, I said to myself.

...And frankly something must have been wrong with me too, because I was dying to get to know Sansa Stark a bit more, I was curious and tempted. _And I consider myself a good person, but I'm not a saint!_ I subtly took off Joffrey's arm from my shoulders.

"Look, I just want to make her look bad in front of the family so I can end things with her. You have no idea the pressure I'm under. My mom, _weirdly,_ loves Sansa, and the business they created is going great. It’s filling the family's pockets. Shit, even my grandfather would leave his retirement to come and rub in my fucking face the fact that I'm a good-for-nothing, waste of time and money. _You have no idea the pressure I have on me!_ My mom can’t wait to see us get married and that’s the last thing I’m interested in."

_So yes,_ at that moment I wondered if Joffrey didn't know how pathetic and cowardly he sounded. The sheer ridiculousness of his plan. _His complete lack of_ _balls._ But more than that, I kept thinking about his girlfriend, that Joffrey didn't respect and appreciate her.

And once again, _if he didn't want to appreciate her, I would gladly do it._

_But not like this._

"Do you even think before you speak?"

The words surprised Joffrey and he looked at Pod in confusion, "What? _As if I didn't notice the way you were fucking her with your eyes!_ She'd make a nice trophy in your list, wouldn't she? _The best!”_ Joff saw deliberation on Pod's face, and he laughed at it, "Come on, cousin, no need to play the nice guy with me, _what's your price?_ "

I stared at him for a few more moments, again, assessing if he was under the influence of some substance, but I recognized him as sober _. Yes, I wanted her. But not like that._ "You should be ashamed of your lack of balls. Just talk to her, man, get it over with, and face your family." I told him after patting him on the shoulder and almost running away from his claws.

I won’t lie, while I was having a drink alone and thinking about the stupid proposition, there was temptation in me, but it was more in terms of fantasy than reality. What I really wanted to do was to go out and find Sansa to warn her about the little man- child of boyfriend she had, tell her that she shouldn't let her guard down. And that _she should_ do the smart thing and break up with him.

That their relationship was not a healthy one.

But I barely knew her to go and talk to her like that. And she surely knew her boyfriend better than I. 

_The most inconceivably absurd, impertinent, insolent, and stupid proposition... was also a temptation,_ removing everything that involved Joffrey.

I kept wondering what would happen if Joffrey proposed the same thing to someone else, someone without moral dilemmas. What would happen if things got out of hand and Sansa got hurt.

_She was going to get hurt._

But it was better to have a broken heart than to end up... _raped because of Joffrey's absurd plan?_ And I know that is an exaggeration, but it’s also a possibility.

_In this world, everything is possible._


	2. Sansa I

**_SANSA I_ **

****

Thirsting after someone else the way I was, was a rather telling sign that a relationship was over. 

To be honest, I've known for some time that my relationship with Joffrey has gone stale and has no future. I've been putting off talking to him but I had planned to do it; It would happen on Monday, the day before I was set to leave for the North.

_And no, I was not being coward! I just wanted to put off_ dealing with all the shit that was bound to fly my way. _All the drama. At least in the North I'll have time to process it… plus, distance from Cersei is of the essence._

But the truth is that ever since yesterday I’ve had this feeling… this _urge_ to get out of this relationship as quickly as possible.

Being dazzled by Podrick Payne made me realize there is nothing left in my relationship with Joffrey. And, yes, I realize how my words about jonesing for someone else sound, _but no, no, no, no._ No, I'm not thinking of jumping from one Lannister to another. _That would be awful; I_ know that better than anyone. What I meant was... Well, I'm bringing up Podrick because...

_...Okay, maybe being attracted to Podrick Payne wasn't normal..._

And it wasn't just the physical stuff _–he's not even my type!–_ What struck me about the previous evening was finding him so charming, so unpretentious about being a _Lannister_ ; even the fact that he emphatically denied really being one, over and over again was a novelty.

He was handsome, or rather cute, so cute. Laid back too, eloquent and endearing when he talked, when he told his stories and jokes. Actually, his entire personality had me charmed… so _yes,_ all of that makes it impossible for to remember our conversations and not feel giddy about it.

Maybe, just maybe I did develop a crush on Podrick Payne. Typical, out _of all the men I met in Casterly Rock yesterday, but I am well aware this crush mostly comes because I’m at the end of an unbearably long relationship, It can’t be that strange, feeling attracted to the first dork who paid attention to me in a while._

_And I mean dork in a nice way. The nicest. He’s not stupid, not in the slightest. He’s corporate lawyer who also is actively involved in human rights, I mean, what’s not to like? Sure, there’s some Lannister in him but overall,_ Podrick seems like a catch, what a lucky woman his girlfriend must be.

I am not even going to address his sparkling personality since I already implied that he has one, in my humble opinion, anyway.

But I will say that what made me like Podrick even more was finding out that he was involved in the lawsuit that _Tarth and Associates brought against the_ Bolton’s a couple of years ago. And sure _,_ my own family lost a considerable amount of money because of that whole affair —unsurprisingly, we held shares in the company— but that was the lawsuit that bankrupted the Bolton’s, sent Roose to jail and made Ramsey a pariah in the North; if you ask me or Jon about it, it served him right for that one time the asshole tried to slip a roofie in my drink, _thank the gods Jon was there and he managed to stop him._

When Podrick brought up his involvement with _Tarth and Associates_ he obviously thought that it would make me hate him or something, but on the contrary, _I was vengefully delighted._ Revenge is a dish best served cold, and Jon and I pettily celebrate the occasion when the ruling came out. _The rest of the family were befuddled as to why we chose that particular weekend to party with such enthusiasm._

Not that I let Podrick know about all this, but he had secretly scored points. And I think I'm straying from what's really important in this story.

_To be clear_ , while I was dazzled by Podrick Payne, and despite my unusual attraction to him, he won’t be my rebound.

There won't be any rebound; it was Podrick's attention that made me realize how incompatible Joffrey and I really are. And of course I wanted the attention that neither of us was giving to the other, because let’s be real, I’m not going to place the blame entirely on Joffrey; I also long for the spark of something new...

So I've set out to find Podrick tonight, to have a conversation with him again and see if the connection I felt between us yesterday was a spur-of-the-moment thing, which it most likely was. I'll probably see a side of him today that will quickly disappoint me...

.

.

.

When I found him, however, I was far from disappointed; he looked very handsome in his dark, semi-formal suit. I had thought he would trim his beard to make himself more presentable, but he hadn't, and somehow that made him look even more appealing.

I thought it was clever of me to slip away from _Creepyfinger_ by getting Podrick’s attention since he hadn't even seen me yet. Watching him blush after kissing his cheek let me know this spark between us was mutual. And then it was my turn to blush as I unabashedly flirted with him.

_To tell you the truth, I’m still not sure if I’m grateful that we were interrupted._

.

.

.

Two hours later, let me just say, it wasn't Joffrey who I was looking for when I stumbled upon him having a hushed chat with Podrick.

You can’t blame me for being curious, can you? ...I mean, _even if my curiosity was entirely triggered by my soon-to-be-ex's cousin? …Ew, I know._

But the truth is, I don't really think of him as being Joffrey's family, they’re like three or four times removed, _barely family_ as far as I'm concerned.

Anyway, when I saw them together I was hesitant to approach but I did it anyway, stopping as soon as I heard Joffrey's words.

_"So, how would you like to seduce my girlfriend? She's a Goddess, isn't she?"_

.

.

.

I listened to the entire conversation. An hour had gone by and although I’m not one to make a scene, I still wanted to hit Joffrey.

At the time all I needed was to be alone to try to calm down after hearing that ridiculous proposal, I was reeling and I didn’t want my most violent instincts to get the best of me.

Arya would tell you that I don't really possess any sort of violent instinct and though normally I would agree with her, right now I’m seeing red and I just want to fucking explode.

_Even a single, well-aimed slap would be blissful._

_I certainly didn’t need another reason to end this relationship, but this was it. This was the last straw._

_What else am I waiting for before going to confront him?_ I don't know.

_Maybe I’m just building up a bit more courage._ With that in mind I poured myself another glass of whiskey to promptly empty it in three deep gulps. _I needed something stronger than wine._ The liquor burned my throat as it passed and it further ignited the growing fire inside me, _which was just what I needed._

I don't love Joffrey anymore, I haven't for a long time, and I know he doesn't love me either. _So why continue with this charade?_

Only one reason. _Cersei. I'_ m afraid of disappointing her. Cersei was perhaps the first person to recognize my abilities in a serious way and not as a stupid girl's hobby. She encouraged me despite my doubts and misgivings. She taught me to take risks even when I had doubts. In the end, she became more than my mentor and business partner.

I _owe her too much._

_It is ridiculous that the thought of breaking up with Joffrey doesn’t hurt me. What It’ll do to my relationship with Cersei hurts more._

_How fucking stupid of me is it that I want to apologize to Cersei first? To warn her? Is that me being loyal or just a kiss-ass?_ Right now I don't understand the relationship between us either. But if I go and talk to her I know she'll tell me to think things through. That in a few days we'll be right as rain again…

And I know very well that Cersei Lannister is many things, but all she has done with me is give me her support and she’s been true to the ideals I proposed for our business _... ‘Helping you in develop your half-charity act may help me redeem myself, little bird. The soul needs it sometimes.’_ I remember her telling me before I signed the contract, though to tell you the truth, even today I’m still uncertain if she had been drinking when she said those words.

I wonder if she'd side with Joffrey if she found out what her son had been up to. I’m sure I know the answer, though; she wouldn't approve but at the end of the day Joffrey is her son.

Another glass of whiskey soon vanished.

Cersei wants to see me married to _Joff and I_ did too for the longest of times.

_Family and business don’t mix well together, especially with a family like that one,_ my dad had said. I’m dreading how the break-up will affect my professional relationship with Cersei and whatever unintended consequences it might bring.

But I can't be with Joffrey anymore just because I care about what she thinks.

And frankly, with that little display, there was no turning back from breaking up with him.

It is at times like these that I envy Arya’s courage _–though I_ would _never admit that to her– she_ wouldn’t hesitate to confront Joffrey without caring who heard or saw her.

_I can't do that. I’m not like that._

After I found the courage and decided to act, finding Joffrey didn't take long. But it did take a couple of seconds to get his attention. Seeing him turning in my direction with that stupid self-assured and arrogant grin made me want to slap it off his face. _But no, I wasn't going to make a scene that would leave me looking bad._

_"I saw you talking to cousin Podrick earlier, I didn't want to interrupt."_ He said making sure to be heard by the people that was with him.

Really, bringing up _Podrick first?_ We had barely said hello to each other, _to my dismay._

Knowing what he had been planning, I decided to play along, I gave him one of my most charming smiles, one he immediately recognized as fake and which warned him of the trouble ahead because his own disappeared from his face, _"…I find your cousin to be a really interesting man." let the people think what they want._ I immediately wanted to add something more about his work so as not to be so transparent but my chance was gone, without waiting I turned and spoke over my shoulder, _"We need to talk.”_ I knew he would be quick to follow.

I didn't face him until we walked into a room and the door was closed, "You're just a coward, aren' _t you?_ If you just wanted to end things you should have told me. I wouldn't have refused. _But asking your cousin, your cousin, to seduce me?!_ I never thought you’d stoop so low." saying all that in an angry tirade but without even shedding a tear had to be proof enough that things between us had long ended. _It didn't hurt._

Joffrey was taken aback, _"He told you?!" What about Pod's reputation, then? Or was he playing a different, more intricate kind of game?_

_I found myself trying to hold back, oh a slap would feel so good. And again, I'm not a violent person, but all I wanted was to shake him. AGGGHHHH!! "You stupid! I heard you asking him!”_ Immediately Joffrey made a gesture as is to shush me, _he cared more about what people would think if they heard._

So I waited, I waited for him to defend himself, to make excuses, but none of that came, so I continued, "The least I expected from you was your respect, but even that was too much to ask."

_"No, Sansa-"_

He tried to approach me but I told him not to even try it. " _No what? You asked your cousin to take me to bed!_ "

Joffrey waved his hands in the air, uselessly asking for a moment but coming up with nothing that would make him look good in all this shitstorm, " _I_ _wasn't thinking clearly! I just…first, I didn't ask him to take you to bed—"_

_What did he think seduce means, then? "—what a lame ass excuse—"_

_Joffrey went on, "—And secondly, I needed an excuse to break up with you that wouldn’t make me the culprit.”_

_I didn't want him anymore, true, but he still managed to get set of all of my frustrations, "You didn't need an excuse, you idiot! I don't want to be with you either! You just needed to say it instead of scheming!" And why did Joffrey think I'd be so easily seduced? Well yes, I was attracted to Podrick in a way that—!!!!! Focus, Sansa! This definitely is not the time to be thinking about that! And when had Joffrey become this pathetic person in front of me?_

_"Yeah, but my mom—"_

_"—Do you know how pathetic it is that you're afraid of what Cersei would say?" I knew that was a cheap shot._

_"...Yes." Sansa knew about the great ambitions his mother had for him, ambitions he could not live up to. "But you're afraid of her, too!" he fought_ back.

"I'm not afraid of her; I just don't want to disappoint her. _That’s different..."_ There was a brief pause after that as both considered her words, "...which is what you should be thinking about.”

_"Don’t you tell me what I should be thinking."_

I found myself rolling my eyes at his way of telling me that _I_ would never understand the complicated relationship he had with Cersei. We both stared at each other for a few moments. "...This is over, Joffrey, and this time it's final." I saw him nodding, over and over again. That’s what he wanted, wasn’t it _?_ "Honestly, this was something I had planned to do before I left for home."

Joffrey didn’t know whether to believe her. _But at least he had until Tuesday to tell everyone. And if he handled things right, his mom would only hear that it had been Sansa who broke things off, not the other way around, and definitely not the reason why. "Look...I wasn't thinking clearly when I proposed that to Podrick..."_

_That was his shorthanded way of apologizing,_ probably only so that she wouldn't tell Cersei the reason behind the breakup. "What made you think I'd fall for that, anyway?" _That’s not like me. Even though I had put out a some ‘hot for Pod’ vibes and he was entirely too yummy—!!!!! Focus, Sansa!_

"Yesterday you seemed to be enjoying yourself with him and mother doesn't like Podrick. Since she’s aware that we are having a rough time…I thought seeing you or at least hearing talk about you two..." _yeah, that was a stupid plan._

_"Cersei wouldn't believe that about me."_

_"Weeeell, Podrick has a reputation. You were practically drooling after him. I just needed to… make it plausible for mother." She rolled her eyes at him, “_ _You don't know the pressure my family puts on me!" She was Catelyn's precious girl and her career was going splendidly, enough to make Ned a proud father._

_Of course I did! what was he talking about? "I've said it before and I'm saying it again; you need to do something with your life."_

_"That's a very easy thing to say for someone who–"_

She raised her hands, _"Oh no, wait! I just realized I don't have to put up with this anymore, or with you." I said really relieved as I went by him...only to open the door and find a handful of people in the hallway._

_People who, in all likelihood, heard the whole thing. Damn it!_

_._

_._

_._


	3. SANSA & PODRICK

**_SANSA & PODRICK_ **

****

Sansa was hiding again and with good reason.

Over an hour had passed when she heard the door to the greenhouse opening and she thought it was probably Cersei coming to tell her that she and Joff were young and that they’d make up in no time. But no, it was none other than Podrick Payne. Perhaps he _had reconsidered his decision and was here to try to seduce her?_

_She had some luck with men. She knew how to pick them._

_But didn’t something deep inside her wanted to see him try?_

_She had heard the whole conversation and though he had refused to be a part of Joffrey’s ridiculous plan, she still had her doubts but she decided to play along for now, find out what his true intentions were._

Podrick saw a glass next to the half-empty bottle of whisky, which impressed him since that was a very hard liquor, “I took you for a red wine kind of woman.” _He was also struck by the fact that she was obviously hiding._

“Sometimes you need something stronger.”

Podrick nodded and decided to get to the point, "I don’t mean to start bad blood but since we got along so well yesterday, I feel I should tell you...what Joffrey asked me to do." And so he decided it’d be better to do this like ripping off a band-aid, _quickly and anticipating the pain;_ he told her what had happened but failed to see her taking in his words with anger or surprise.

Sansa listened closely to him. He was adamant as to why playing those games seemed unfair to her and dangerous. _She studied him as he talked and she found him to be sincere. Still, she did have that pesky habit of miss reading people, specially some men and if he was being sincere, then she had to conclude that he had more respect for her than Joffrey did. Huh!_

_Podrick looked serious and uncomfortable; he was respectful keeping his distance though he was blushing under her stare. He was also quick to apologize for getting involved in all this and reassuring her that he hadn’t considered Joffrey's proposal even for a second._

_Podrick, or Pod as he had asked her to call him the previous evening, had good eyes, good, honest eyes. Annoyingly cute eyes... not that that was important. Anyway, he had the kind of honest eyes that she had believed would not serve him as a lawyer, but at that moment she discovered why she had been wrong in that assumption. If he turned out to be lying, not only was he a good liar, but she was a complete moron believing him._

And maybe she was being foolish and irrational, maybe she was under the influence of the end of her relationship with Joffrey... but Pod did look sincere. She relented and admitted that she heard him talking to Joffrey and that she actually had already ended things between them, which seemed to take him by surprise.

Podrick nodded, "...It was the best thing to do." He answered in a fit of hypocrisy; like he wasn’t thinking that now he might stand a chance with her, _even if deep down he knew it was a ridiculous notion._

Sansa didn't know what it was, whether it was the irony of the situation or the tone of his voice that elicit a chuckle that had him respond in kind. That exchange gave him the confidence to walk through the doorway and sit down by her.

It wasn't that she needed to explain it but she did anyway, "...Things with Joffrey haven't been right for a long time, and I'm not hiding because I'm heartbroken or ashamed but because I don't want to deal with Cersei when she realizes what happened.”

_"Ahhh." He thought it was great that she wasn't hurting._

Sansa took another sip of her drink, "It would have been less stupid of me to wait until Tuesday to break up with him, but I really wasn’t thinking about the consequences, and now I know the next few days will be just _wonderful..._ "

"It's not hard to imagine why breaking up with Joffrey was a priority." he said being transparent and accepting that the news didn't displease him at all, " _He's a real jerk." The_ way her eyes flashed and the corners of her mouth went up had him feeling like there was a complicity between them already, "...and there's no reason to stay, either. I don’t know how things work in the North but down here we have something called hotels. _.."_ he teased _. It was a bad jab and he knew it, "You_ just call or show up and they let you have a room for a night or more, depending on your needs."

Sansa rolled her eyes, _jokes about the disadvantages of the North and the progress of the South were familiar territory; oh, she knew them all,_ "Well, believe it or not my family owns a chain of hotels. And that's an option, but my parents and siblings are driving me crazy about this Butterfly Fever and social distancing. So it’s best for me to endure the humiliation, swallow my pride, and stay here until Tuesday. _Not that I want to, but I’ll do it.”_

She had told him that on Tuesday a diplomatic flight would be leaving for the North; her mother had secured a spot for her on it _._ "This is going to sound sudden, and I know we barely know each other... _but_ I do have a place in the mountains." He tied to be nonchalant, like the idea of spending the weekend with her wasn’t exciting. _Get it out of your head, Payne,_ he chided himself before making another joke to avoid any awkwardness, "It’s quiet and remote. It's humble, not the family’s penthouse suite you're probably accustomed to, but it is nice and comfortable."

There were several thoughts that went through Sansa’s mind then; first, she knew that after losing his wife when Podrick was very young, Mr. Payne hadn’t wanted Pod growing up as a Lannister so he had raised him pretty separate from that side of the family, in a more humble environment, hence the rich girl joke, _even if at_ _the end of the day he was_ _a rich boy_ _too._

Second, she was attracted to him so it was a dangerous game she’d be playing because she really wouldn’t mind getting to know him better.

And third, it was sudden and he caught her off guard, they barely knew each other and who was to say that she was not going to end up lying in a ditch, raped and dead.

Pod kept on talking, unaware of the doubts creeping in her mind, "I didn’t want to stay here with _The Family_ in case we were sent into lockdowns, _which we know is coming, we just don’t know_ when the president is announcing it... and I made arrangements in case I needed to make a run for it. So…you can come if you want

Sansa threw him a suspicious look, "...Is this you going along with Joffrey's plan?

Podrick laughed at that and it took him a couple of seconds to realize she was being serious, " _No! …I was just trying to be nice!_ "

Sansa looked intently at him again, she searching for any dark motives behind that mischievous look that seemed to be pure him but there wasn’t anything she could interpret as sinister. "You're right, we hardly know each other." She _wasn't leaving with a complete stranger, even if a part of her wanted to._ "But I won't lie, there's a petty and vengeful part of me that would love to make Joffrey believe his brilliant plan succeeded." Pod's eyebrows shot straight to his hairline at that.

_"That would be stooping to his level."_

_"Well, don't think I’m above it either. If I knew you a bit better I wouldn't think about it twice."_ Although it was a joke her words had a tinge of truth to them, "The thing that’s stopping me is the fear of ending up in a ditch somewhere..."

Pod laughed at that, _"Well, it would be pretty stupid of me to do that with so many people to witness our departure.”_

_"...Stranger things have happened..."_

_"... Ah but look at my goofy face, surely I can’t hurt a fly..."_

_"That’s what a serial killer would say, wouldn't it?"_ Podrick continued to smile at her amused, _"You might not be a ´Lannister’ Lannister, but you’re still one, they’d definitely help you out of any trouble just to avoid the scandal. Besides, you didn't even grow up with them, they don't know you, they have no reason to think you are a serial killer."_ Sansa went on, getting into the story unraveling in her head.

"I really hope that you are a better fashion designer than you are a psychological profiler.”

_"Oh, how dare you?!"_ she exclaimed mock-offended and Pod began to apologize amidst their laughter. She spoke again after they both had calmed down, "Anyway, Pod, thank you... for refusing Joffrey's plans… and for extending the invitation.”

Podrick nodded, feeling disappointed but understanding this was a dismissal; she wanted to be alone so he stood up, "Just so you know, I'm not a serial killer."

By the time Sansa resurfaced she realized two things; Joffrey had told Cersei _part of_ _what happened_ and the jerk ran off to party on leaving _her_ to deal with his mother.

The good thing was that the woman was too busy and they didn’t interact much but still it wasn’t pleasant.

_"Don't worry, little bird, by tomorrow he'll be regretful and looking for forgiveness. You shouldn't have let him go, though. Don’t you know where he might be?"_

It was the condescending tone, the stroke down her back as if to encourage her, and then the fact that she practically blamed her for Joffreay taking off, which made her change her plans. Sansa was quick to tell her that she didn’t want Joff back. _That their story was over and it was final._ She also apologized, and in hurry left Cersei alone.

Sansa went to the room where she was staying to pack what little she had taken out of her suitcase. She also checked her documents to make sure that nothing important was left behind. The last thing she needed was for Cersei the next day, or worse, _the next couple o_ _days, trying_ to intrude on her private life and offering more of the same brand of commentary.

As soon as she opened the door, she found herself facing Myrcella, obviously sent there by her mother, who set her eyes on the suitcase right away.

"Joffrey's an idiot and my mom's a pain in the ass, but that doesn't mean you have to leave." Sansa struggled for words before Myrcella followed her closely as they made their way through a back exit that would stop her from making a triumphant escape through the front door, _"Where are you going anyway?"_

"A hotel."

" _With that virus around? You're crazy._ You can go to my apartment if you want. I’ll be here for the next few days anyway." she said _, it wasn’t like Sansa hadn’t stayed with her before._

Sansa didn't want to have anything to do with the Lannisters at the moment, saying that to Myrcella wasn’t fair, " _I know. Thank you._ But right now I feel like I need some distance."

Myrcella nodded in understanding but her attention was diverted when her phone vibrated and she looked at the text, "Well, if mom asks, tell her that I was very insistent that you shouldn't leave, but that I couldn't convince you, okay?”

Sansa smiled and thanked her; Myrcella kissed her goodbye saying that if she changed her mind she should call her so she could let her doorman know to expect her.

Sansa knew that she could ask one of the Lannister’s drivers to take her to a hotel but she didn't want to give Cersei a chance to throw anything in her face later on. She could order an Ubber or a taxi, but it didn’t seem like a smart choice with the threat of the virus so she texted the only person she could think of.

S: Could you take me to a hotel?

S: Please.

.

.

.

"The Targaryen siblings obviously want to profit from the vaccine they are developing, but Ned Stark blocked that on behalf of Jon's interests of course. He’s making a point to say that the vaccine should be given away for free or at low cost." Varys told Rose, the beautiful companion that Tyrion had dared bring to Casterly Rock.

"I hear they intend to sell it for a hefty return on their investment; they’ll try taking advantage of us." Rose replied noticing Tyrion's bored face while his nephew, Podrick, was very focused on the conversation.

_"…Well..."_ Varys refuted in a condescending manner, "The siblings are still recovering after their father's embezzlement of the family business. They want to innovate in the pharmaceutical industry and they wish to strengthen their presence in Westeros’ markets. They have made very large investments in technology that even the industrial conglomerated on this side of the pond don't have yet. Hence the likely high cost of the vaccine. I think that's only fair…”

Tyrion interrupted Rose as she was about to speak, "It seems to me that the honorable Ned Stark doesn’t learn, I heard it was him who decided to expose everything to our beloved president Stannis and to the industrial empires of our continent……as if he didn’t know that this is a nest of vipers and that every single company on our soil would do the same thing that the Targaryens are trying to do.”

_"That's true."_ Pod added only to feel his cell-phone vibrating, "Corruption is everywhere and–" he left his words unfinished as he read the message.

_S: Could you take me to a hotel?_

_S: Please._

_That probably didn’t mean what he wanted it to mean._ Still, he was surprised and he was quick to apologize before standing up and walking away as he texted back asking where to find her.

When Sansa caught a glimpse of him minutes later, she apologized for having no one else to turn to. She explained why she changed her mind as he took her suitcase from her in order to make their hasty way towards the garage, lest someone should see them and warn Cersei.

Pod suddenly felt someone following them and as he looked over his shoulder a man asked her haughtily where she thought she was going and reminded her that he was her assigned bodyguard for her stay. To his surprise, her tone betrayed how little patience with the man she had.

Sansa didn’t stop walking, "My stay here is over, so you can relax, Clegane. And remember: social distancing, so back off. _"_

Podrick figured she had her reasons for being rude. He pointed to the black jeep as he looked back and saw the man following them with his eyes, _well, following her,_ looking her up and down, licking his lips. _Yes. The guy was definitely creepy._ Pod hastily opened the door for her and then went to put the suitcase in the trunk and all the while the man's eyes remained on them.

Sansa addressed Pod’s curiosity once he had set the car in motion, _"...Please don't ask if he's another suitor..."_

"I was just wondering what Cersei is doing hiring a guy like that as your bodyguard…" The way he was undressing her with his eyes was enough to make him want to keep him at a distance _, in_ _her own words._

"He knows when to behave." But _even if_ _he had never tried anything she usually avoided being alone with him._ "Another great thing that I’m leaving behind, I guess." she said looking in the rearview mirror as the house got smaller and smaller.

It took them a few minutes before they were off the mansion’s grounds and when they reached the main gate he wanted to tell her she was free, but he held back and asked instead, _“Where to?"_


	4. Chapter 4

As they filled the gas tank, Sansa sneaked around the back of the Jeep to check the license plate and send it to Arya who had been texting her about spending the weekend in a remote country house with a stranger. 

'Are you crazy or are you stupid? What's wrong with you?' 

'This is the plot of a horror movie.' 

'Just because he's a Lannister it doesn't mean he's not a serial killer. It’s actually the opposite.'

'Okay, keep this mind, if he tries anything you punch him right in the throat or the nose. Remember to always plant your feet on the floor, it gives you stability and greater strength. Keep your knees free at all times, a knee between the legs always works.'

'Our parents are going to have a heart attack when they find out about all this.'

'Yes, yes, I promise not to tell them anything. But really, Sansa?' 

"No, I don't think like I'm exaggerating! You texted for a reason!'

'No, it's not being an overprotective sister, it's you being a moron. Seriously, I'm not going to be able to sleep thinking about what might happen to you.'

'Don't turn off your GPS.'

These were just some of the texts she had gotten after she accepted Pod's invitation to his country house and she decided to tell Arya about it... just in case. Now she knew it would have been better to keep her mouth shut and tell her family about everything upon her arrival in the North. 

She continued studying the darkness along the road while she talked to Pod and messages from 'Sansa.' 'Sansa!' 'Don't ignore me!' kept coming to her. She saw Pod taking a look at her phone and decided to come clean, "I told my sister about your invitation and...she's reacting as expected; she thinks you're a serial killer." 

"Do you guys have a lot of those up North, or what?" he asked cheekily and she rolled her eyes at him.

"She wants a picture of you. To ease her mind."

Podrick smiled, "To ease her mind or to have evidence?"

"Yes. That." She admitted and she saw him shaking his head, but he also was leaning over and turning to look out the opposite window, apparently unfazed or annoyed by the request. Unlike her...

Podrick wondered if Sansa had taken notice of the number sirens and patrol lights in the distance and along the road. "Was your sister like that when you started dating Joffrey too?" He asked suddenly realizing how that may sound, "Not that we are dating, I just wondered if she is always like that when you do this kind of thing..." Great… now he was implying that it was normal for her to take off with strangers for the weekend!

He seemed flustered and frustrated with himself, which she found funny and borderline adorable, "Yes." she replied refraining from mocking him. "Sister stuff, I guess." she picked up her cell phone, "So, may I take your picture?" 

Podrick slowed down as glanced between her and the road, then he sat up straighter and turned a bit while smiling at the camera. That earned him a laugh from her, "My best side…… so I don't look like a serial killer."

Sansa took the shot and the bastard looked even better in the picture, "This can't be that strange for you, I’m sure plenty of other girls have taken precautions…”

Well, she’d be surprised to know that her counterparts weren’t as careful. But it was a remote place so he could see how she had reason to be concerned. Plus, she was a Stark, a heiress to a great fortune. The fact that she wasn’t surrounded by bodyguards was odd enough as it was and frankly, a bit irresponsible of her, not that he was complaining.

"...Oh, I forgot to ask if there is a girl in Storm's End who may not be too pleased with this turn of events. I wouldn't like to attract that kind of trouble..." That alone would be the cherry on top of the scandal that was coming her way over her breakup with Joffrey.

He looked at her sensing that the question was more loaded than she was pretending it was. "No, nothing to worry, there." He looked at her phone, which started vibrating to announce an incoming message, "So, what's the little sister's verdict?"

"Her name is Arya, and she says, 'Certainly not what I expected, though that doesn't prove he's not a serial killer.'" 

"Oh, great!" he said with feigned enthusiasm, "Look, this could be weird...but if you want, I'll talk to her to calm her down." 

Truthfully, she was embarrassed by all this, "Yes, it is weird, but no, I don't want to bother you, you are being nice and we are paranoid." Sansa complained quietly just before she got and incoming call from Arya. 

And well, there wasn't much to be done about the weirdness and she shouldn't be embarrassed, after all, Podrick was a stranger and she was relatively prominent, there were reasons to fear for her safety. 

Anyway, she rejected the call at first, which had Pod prompting her to accept it, "You don't know my sister, she's probably going to threaten you." He laughed, "She'll probably inform you that she masters all sorts of martial arts and that she personally will chase you to the end of the world if something unfortunate were to happen to me." 

"Nothing unfortunate will happen to you!" Quite the opposite, if she gave him the chance, in fact. "Go on, call her." he said as he tried to chase away the unwelcome yet tempting thoughts. Besides, he had to keep in mind that Sansa's paranoia probably had something to do with that half-empty bottle of whiskey she had been nursing before leaving Casterly Rock.

"Yes, yes, yes, everything's fine." "I think it's about two hours away." "...Yes, it's pretty far..." another sigh, "He wants to talk to you too, to calm you down. Be nice."

Podrick greeted her as soon as he realized she was in speaker and immediately after he heard an 'Arya' followed by the little sister’s litany of threats against him just as Sansa had predicted, and which included an extensive list of martial arts moves she’d inflict on him and some of the places where she had learned them. Her firm tone and the intensity in her words told him he’d be wise to take her seriously and so, he let her vent until there was nothing left for her to add and now it was he who spoke, telling her that he understood.

There was a long silence, as the two sisters had expected him to argue or say something else, "…You know, I also spent some time in Essos after finishing my tour with the army, I went to Mereen, to Slaver's Bay–" 

"–Those are not vacation destinations…even though they're beautiful."

"Oh, yes, beautiful, but a bit depressing." Podrick added because not many people like them tended to visit those poor locations and if they did, it was either to help or to train.

"It made a mark on me," he admitted, though not in a good way; the visit left him distraught and dwelling in a sort of identity crisis that made him rethink everything in his life, but in a destructive direction where he was doing nothing useful with his life for a while. "I trained in some of those places too… Anyway, Braavos and The House of Black and White? The Many-faced-god? Congratulations! That’s one of the most arduous programs in the world, and until now I've never met anyone who's finished it!"

"…Huh? Thank you?" 

"It's fantastic! Seriously. I went there too, although not with the same impetus as you; just to get a feel for the place, though I did stay for some weeks to take some lessons.

"Did you meet Jagen H'ghar?"

"Of course I did! It was really expensive but it was well worth it!" 

"I know! He was my teacher! Hey, when were you there? Maybe we even crossed paths...” 

Podrick didn’t think so, “Let’s see, I graduated from The Knights of The Vale in –” 

"You went to the Knights of The Vale?! Sansa, that's where dad went!" 

Sansa had been silent all that time taking notice of how he had been softening up Arya too, either intentionally or he was just that good at conversing, "I know!" she said gracefully this time, since her reaction had been the same as Arya’s. "Yohn Royce was his head master too…” 

"Oh, we love Yohn Royce! He’s good friends with Dad and he’s really good with us!” 

Podrick smiled, "Heh! Well he can tell you I'm not serial killer! Though, I doubt he remembers me." Pod had been a quiet student never one to get in trouble. 

"Hey, if you tell me you met Izembaro too, I won't think you're a serial killer, I’ll think that you're stalking us!" 

Podrick laughed again, "Life is full of little coincidences? But I guess that if you learned from Jagen, you have been studying the inflections on my voice, my breathing, my–" 

"Yeah, you are telling the truth. This is all just a coincidence.”

Podrick went on to share with her the dates of his time in Braavos and he heard her reply that it was impossible for them to have met. He assumed that what he would say next would appeal to someone like her, "A few years ago I bought Izembaro’s Dark Sister."

Absolute silence.

"…WHAT?!!!!" 

Hearing Arya's shriek, Sansa imagined her bolting up so hard she’d crashed into the ceiling just as Podrick chuckled at her reaction and for the next few minutes she listened to them talking about how much he paid for it, how he had made sure it was the real one, how much the insurance had cost and how a museum had asked him to lend it for an exhibit of Weteros’ Ancient Weapons. 

Sansa rested her head against the seat lulled by their conversation until several minutes later she sensed the talk coming to an end with Pod saying that it was possible for Duncan the Tall to be an ancestor of his boss Brienne.

"Hey, is it me or have I heard way too many ambulance sirens on your end?” 

Podrick and Sansa looked at each other since that was something they both had been trying to ignore.

"We're in the countryside and in the city is worst. This virus situation is not good." Podrick offered meekly.

The hmmm that left Arya told her everything. At least the North was not that affected, or so they told her. Sansa cleared her throat, "So what do you think of Pod, Arya?" 

"He sounds normal."

"Says my oh-so-normal sister." She said to push aside heaviness that the topic of pandemic brought.

"Ha. Ha. Very funny.” Arya replied wryly.

After that, Arya and Pod said their goodbyes, and Arya asked to be taken off speaker. "...Sansa, this Podrick is, for lack of a better word, interesting, no, he is charming. If he got to you as easily as he got to me in one conversation... let's just say I understand, now.” 

"Mmm," She felt that the less she said, the better, though Arya’s laughter elicited a blush.

"Good thing I'm not in your shoes, because unlike you, I’m sure to misbehave… now that I’m certain he’s not a psycho, of course.”

It was weird how Arya could read her even when she was acting out of character. "That always goes without saying, Arya." 

"Oh ho ho! Is that envy in your voice I hear?!"

"Shut up." she replied unable to contain the humor in her voice, which made Arya laugh in surprise.

"Seriously now, I liked him and that’s good, your taste in men is terrible and we've never agreed on anything. This is a first. So you have my blessing to do whatever you want with him this weekend. ”

A stilted "...Uh..." came out of her mouth as Podrick chose that precise moment to look at her. She hadn’t been expecting his attention or Arya's words, let alone the images that her mind conjured of all she wanted to do with him. Trying to hide her unease, Sansa smiled at Pod as warmly as she could, and he turned his eyes back to the road. "…Right, like I need your blessing…" 

"You don’t, and I won’t judge if something utterly interesting happened between you two. He may not be your usual type but wasting this opportunity would be crazy... Sansa? Sansa?! Are you still there? ... She hung up on me!”  
.  
.  
.  
A huge pool, a tempting hot-tub, a sauna and a BBQ terrace overlooking the Sunset Sea in the distance.

Of course his house in the mountains would overlook the ocean somehow, a knack for prime real estate was embedded in Lannister DNA much as he seemed to dislike it.

So far Podrick Payne’s bachelor hideaway seemed normal enough, though she doubted she would get a tour of the sex-dungeon so early in her stay.

Gods she really hoped there was no sex-dungeon… though that sounded better than a torture room, or… gods what if he was a serial killer? What was she doing coming to the mountains with a complete stranger?

Well, not a complete stranger, and she didn’t think serial killers blushed that much or that they could make their victims laugh so much over the ride to their lairs.

…she would know, she had known her share of creeps in her time.

Still, there were plenty of closed doors along the hall that led to the guest room where she would be staying but she wasn’t sure snooping around her gracious host’s rooms was the best way to start this… friendship.

She was overthinking it. That’s what happens when you make rash, drunkenish decisions and then get enough time sober up in the way. She would probably get the complete tour tomorrow and she’d ask nicely what all those rooms were for.

So she steeled herself and made her way to the terrace where he was rearranging two chaise lounges so that they’d face the house instead of the ocean.

“Hey!”

“Hey!, so did milady find everything to her satisfaction?” He asked going over to the mini-bar to get her the soda she had asked for upon arrival.

“What I’ve see of your house is lovely, thank you for letting me stay.” She said as she took the bottle from his hand.

“Of course.”

No, a serial killer probably wouldn’t suggest staying up to watch the sunrise together seeing as it was almost dawn, anyway.

Or smile at her like that.

Jury was still out on the sex dungeon, though.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, thanks to fangfaceandrea for the translation and all her ideas!


End file.
